Unless you love yourself, it's hard for you to believe that anyone else will.
Self-esteem is important for a healthy relationship. When you truly like yourself, in spite of any failings and weaknesses you may have, you'll feel confident. And when you feel confident and secure within yourself, you can enjoy being with your partner for the joy they bring to your life, not because you feel you need them to survive. For tips on building confidence see the Improving confidence site.
If you've had bad experiences in the past, it's worth working through these issues with a trusted friend or counsellor. It can be tempting to lean on your partner and rely on them for reassurance, but the stronger you are as an individual, the stronger and more equal your relationship will be.
Like your partner
Healthy relationships happen between two people who really like each other. It may be more romantic to talk about love, but it's important to remember that love is an emotion that comes and goes.
If you genuinely like each other, enjoy being together, agree with how each other thinks and behaves, and share the same dreams in life, then loving feelings will never be too far away.
It's important to tell your partner you like them, too. Warm words of encouragement and support build trust and respect. Add the odd compliment as well and you'll be helping to boost their self-esteem.
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